stop and go

have you ever felt like life was moving too fast and yet at the same time, the day is dragging on? well thats how today feels. i dont know if its because im looking forward to so many things, and at the same time dreading turning in homework and taking tests this week. im super excited that im turning 21. i haven't drinkin' in 2 years. i know i know, most of you probably think im crazy to stop drinking for 2 years. but it makes this birthday all the more exciting. on top of that, im getting a tattoo on wednesday. it's going to be freaking awesome. i shouldnt be spending the money on it, i dont really have the money to be spending on it right now, but im going to. why you ask? well, because i feel like i need to be doing something fun for myself. i've been down in a bit of a rut, and i haven't really felt like there was anyone i could turn to recently. even those that are supposedly supposed to be taking me out for my birthday haven't called me back. i don't even know if im going out for my birthday at this point. then my best friend, or so called at this point, is coming to california and i dont even think she cares to see me. i mean, we were on the phone earlier and spent more time beig silent and not saying anything more than we were actually talking. sad huh? well, so im going to party it up. any ladies in sd looking to party for an evening?? i gotta find a fun gay bar and go for ladies night. any one have any ideas?